The Change

CHANGE. Change is a demon inevitable. It seeps in and snatches away the monotony of life that we have grown so used to. It doesn’t matter if it comes with invitation or without. It doesn’t matter what it brings happiness or sadness. But the moment of change is weird. I say weird because I don’t think there’s any other word that fits with the array of emotions one can experience at that time.
The call to board the flight for new life has been announced. The plane has taken off. I am sitting 35000ft above the ground as I write this. And the view from my window is breath-takingly beautiful.
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Usually at the times like these I dissolve myself into books or music or both but today is different. I unable to concentrate on the book in my hand. The pain is not letting me. Pain? Yes, pain. I don’t know if its the right word. But what do you call it when your heart gets heavy at the time of leaving behind your loved ones to write a new chapter for yourself. Tears fill your eyes when you say goodbyes. Of course that’s the path that everyone must follow but it hurts no? You know you are going far away where only those memories will accompany you. But then you console yourself telling yourself that they are with you always, in your heart. You have technology to connect you to them in an instant…. But.. Deep down you know that this technology won’t give you a hug when you will head back from office, tired and exhausted.
So, what am I feeling? I don’t know. I am numb. Am I excited? Yes, but the excitement hasn’t reached my face yet. The unknown is scaring me right now. I wish I could go back and cuddle next to my mom. I wish I could go back to my childhood. I wish I could go back to the time when I would recklessly hangout with friends. But only if this world was a wish granting factory.
Future is staring me in my eyes, the change ahead waiting to test me if I am strong enough. I doubt. I don’t know if I am capable. Then a fleeting thought reminds me of my dreams, reminds me that it’s the starting of the hope of getting them fulfilled one day.
The landing has been announced. I wipe off the tears that have come down to kiss my cheeks. I try gaining back my composure, controlling the flurry of emotions. I gather my possessions along with my thoughts. We have landed in a new city for a new life. I get up to walk down towards the arrival gate. I know I have left behind too much but I also know that there’s so much to be gained at the other end.

What was the biggest change in your life? How did you feel when the change swept in your life?

mysign

21 Comments Posted

  1. Aww don’t be sad Nibhz.. May this new journey bring lots of good things in your life ๐Ÿ™‚ N yeah, we will meet soon ๐Ÿ˜‰

  2. Nibha,beauty of life you pen,i think always touch core of heart….
    More to learn from life incoming days.. Have a brave heart to store
    the experience….
    Continue to pen.

  3. It’s scary this thing called change especially when it involves leaving all that we know, our loved ones behind…I can totally understand what you feel and I’ll just say go through it, that will be best…Hugs!

  4. When we move out of our comfort zones, we all feel anxious and have that fear of the unknown. But it is seen that after the 2nd or 3rd step of moving out of our comfort zone, the fear and anxiety fades and we start enjoying and very soon this new change falls into our comfort zone… so dont worry, dont be sad… go all out and explore this new journey! All the very best, Nibha!

  5. Aww! Nibha! Kiddo..I first left parents behind for Engineering when I was 17..then friends behind when I was 22. every time, I moved miles apart with those tears, unable to smile and thinking what’s more important – dreams or being with loved ones. But today, I know it was well worth the pain. You will also love the change and write about it. Just relax and smile. this too shall pass. hugs!!

    • Thanks for the encouragement. Though I have been away from home since last six years but this feels so different. And yeah I will surely write about it : Bangalore Bytes ๐Ÿ˜›

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